Customer Service – A Thing of the Past?

by // // 5 Comments

Yesterday was a beautiful day. So, I decided to leave my office for the first time in a couple of weeks, during the day, and take myself to lunch. I went into the sandwich shop close to my office and ordered a sandwich. While they were making it I requested that my sandwich be warmed. I was then informed that there was no way for them to heat my sandwich. I was floored. You are a sandwich shop and you have no means of giving the customer a choice of a warm sandwich versus a cold one? I then proceeded to ask them why and I was told “it is more convenient for us to not to have to stop and warm the sandwiches for the customer.” I was horrified. More convenient for them! What about what the customer wants or needs. There may have been a reason behind me asking for a warm sandwich other than I just don’t like cold food. This is an example of bad customer service. Evidently this company is more concerned about inconveniencing their employees than doing right by their customers.

Then, I proceeded to leave the sandwich shop, after only eating about 3/4 of my meal, to head to the cupcake place around the corner. Oh boy. I go in and the guy at the register hands me this huge menu, a two page color brochure of gorgeous cupcakes. So I stand there and peruse the menu. Finally, I choose german chocolate and champagne wedding cake, I order six of both. Only for him to say, “Those aren’t on our daily menu. We only make certain cupcakes each day. So choose from this list.” He then points to a Friday daily menu list with only about six cupcakes on it, none of which I want. Who does that? What company gives you a menu of services then says, “Oh, we only provide these on this day?” Again an example of a company that is doing what is convenient for them, not what their customer wants or needs. This is again bad customer service. I proceeded to tell him exactly how bad this procedure is for his customers and I left.

Then, at dinner last night I went to my favorite sushi place in town for a quiet meal all by myself. My husband had a meeting so I treated myself to dinner out. My waiter was a young man in his early twenties. He barely spoke two words to me after I was seated, except to ask for my order, which he acted like was an inconvenience. Then, every time I asked him for something he grunted like I was bothering him. Then, the hostess proceeded to sit a family next to me with a screaming child, without asking. I hate it when they do that. Some people prefer NOT to dine out next to families with unruly children/toddlers. I am one of them. So my solitude was over and I promptly left.

Restaurants and businesses need to cater to the desires and needs of their patrons. If it is not for their customers they would not be in business. Only doing what is convenient for them as a business will not keep them in business very long. We as customers do not care what is convenient for them. We only care about whether or not what they have meets our desires or needs. Companies will do better if they remember that.

Where I work we always put the customer first. It may be inconvenient, but that does not matter. Excellent customer service is what drives your business and maintains your customer base. Don’t you agree?

thegeekwife

Alabama Disaster Relief – Let’s Make a Difference

by // // 2 Comments

I rolled over and looked at my cell phone, it said 2:30 a.m. on Monday morning.. The weatherman had said it would get bad in Birmingham around 3:00 a.m., he wasn’t far off. I switched over to my ABC 33/40 weather app to look at radar and I said to myself, “we will be going to the basement shortly”. No sooner that that thought crossed my mind, the weather siren went off and the tornado was not far away. About that time the weather radio went off, and then our local meteorologist was calling out our town to take cover.

My husband is a ham radio operator and his fellow radio operators started calling out reports of what was happening where. I knew then the tornado was way too close for comfort. We grabbed our clothes, dressing as we ran for the basement, as he was checking in as an operator in case he was needed during the storm. We get to the basement and my husband is nervous. You see, the storms in 1998 destroyed the house we now live in, with my husband still trapped inside. The April 27, 2011 storms just missed our house by 4 miles and this tornado would miss us by 7 miles. We would get lucky again.

As I watched my husband work his ham radio to see how he could help, I watched him worry that once again he would have to survive the devastation that a tornado can bring. I had never been more scared in my life. I saw the devastation after April 27, 2011 and those images continued to flash through my mind. I am reminded every day as I drive home through a town, where many people died during the 2011 tornadoes, how bad it can be. Thankfully, we dodged a bullet, per se. But, others were not so lucky. Three people died in this storm and and our hearts and prayers are with their families.

Bloggers in and out of state can make a difference. The Christian Service Mission has had a tremendous impact on our community after the tornadoes ravaged our state. You however, can make a difference! The Alabama Disaster Relief Blogging Program, for every blog post written, will donate $25 to the Christian Service Mission, to raise money for tornado disaster relief. The goal is to raise $1000 by March 1, 2012, for this great charity. Please donate your time and share your story. Let’s help get Alabama back on its feet, and give hope to those who so badly need it.

Share your story on Facebook, Twitter, wherever you feel that you can reach the most people. Let’s make a difference together.

thegeekwife

Weight Loss

by // // 2 Comments

A year ago next month I wrote a post on this blog called Hiding. It talked about how I was hiding behind all of my busyness and not dealing with feelings, etc…In working to deal with all of that I decided I needed to quit hiding behind my weight. I had told myself for years I comfortable with who I was and my weight wasn’t an issue. I became comfortable being plus sized and I was o.k. with that. After the domestic violence, I used my weight as a shield of comfort and that made me feel more secure.

My relationship with food again was one of comfort. Somehow, after my mother died that all changed. I did not want to die young. I went and had a complete workup, convinced I was sick, and everything came back fine. But, my doctor said the weight has to come off, because if it doesn’t you could be. Wow, that hurt. I have always been healthy. My cholesterol has always been that of a person half my age, the same with all my other blood work. Was I going to let my weight kill me? Heck no!

So, in January of 2011 I began a weight loss campaign. My goal, to lose 25-30 pounds that year. It is slow but good progress. Did I make my goal? ABSOLUTELY! I lost 30.2 pounds  and lost 12.5 inches total last year. This year my goal is to double that. I would like to have lost all of my weight before my next high school reunion in 2014.

You see I have never been to any of my high school reunions, or high school functions, including home football games, because of my weight. I won’t even let friends from high school follow me on Facebook because of my weight. You won’t see many pictures of me in the last 25 years because of my weight. I have even skipped family reunions in the last 2 years because of my weight. I was so tiny in high school. I am not saying I want that body back, but I would like to be able to walk into a room and have people look at me for who I am not my weight.

So, you see my weight loss journey is about a lot more than weight. It is about getting back to me. Along with dealing with all the other stuff, which I have been doing an excellent job of this and last year, I am now managing to steadily lose weight too. For everyone trying to lose weight, you can do it, one pound at a time, and for me that is exactly what it is. One pound, one day at a time. Just like I work my domestic violence recover one day at a time, this I will too. Look out 2012 I own you!

thegeekwife

Reading Challenge of 2012

by // // 2 Comments

Last year I read 48 books which, was surprising even to me, considering I was in graduate school until June. The volume of reading I had to do for my program made casual reading next to impossible. This year I do not have that limitation so, I am hoping to be able to read 70 books. I read books of all types. I prefer thrillers, legal and murder, and I also read true crime and historical fiction. One genre you will not find on my list is romance. Here is a list of some of the books I currently have stored on my Kindle to read this year. Now, not to say I have not ordered other books, because I belong to two books clubs too.

  1. Chasing Amanda by Melissa Foster
  2. The Confession: A Novel by John Grisham
  3.  Crossing Into Medicine Country by David Carson
  4. Delirious by Daniel Palmer
  5. The Ghosts of Varner Creek by Michael Weems
  6. The Grove by John Rector
  7. Hotel on the Corner of Bitter and Sweet by Jamie Ford
  8. Irreparable Harm by Melissa Miller
  9. The Judas Strain by James Rollins
  10. The Language of the Threads by Gail Tsukiyama
  11. Medical Error by Richard Mabry
  12. My Splendid Concubine by Lloyd Lofthouse
  13. No Time to Run by J.D. Trafford
  14. On Gold Mountain by Lisa See
  15. Our Hart, Elegy for a Concubine by Lloyd Lofthouse
  16. Phantom in the River by Foster Gary Wayne
  17. Postcards From Nam by Uyen Nicole Duong
  18. The Reversal by Michael Connelly Seventh Heaven by Alice Hoffman
  19. Silent Tears: A Journey of Hope by Kay Bratt
  20. Spirit Horses by Alan S. Evans
  21. They Never Die Quietly by D.M. Annechino
  22. Unbroken: A World War II Story of Survival by Laura Hillenbrand
  23. Dream Of Joy by Lisa See

Of course this is just a partial list. I have over 123 samples of books on my Kindle I would like to read. But, I will not list all of those here. If you are curious if I have read a particular book, leave me a comment and I will give you a review of that book, if I have read it. What are some of the books you are reading this year? I am always on the look out for a good read! Enjoy your reading this year.

thegeekwife

 

Falling In Love, Again

by // // No Comments

My husband and I left on our yearly sojourn to the mountains in Gatlinburg, TN this past week after what has seemed like the most stressful two years of our life together. We have faced multiple instances of unemployment, that induces an incredible amount of stress on any marriage. We almost did not get to go as a member of the family had a medical emergency the night before we left, adding yet more stress. However, we were determined to go.

We arrived in the mountains later than we wanted to so we just rested the first night. On the second day we made our way to the spot where my husband got down on one knee and proposed to me. We have made our way back to this spot several times since then, but this time we needed the calmness, peace and serenity this place brings us. It lies about 4,000 feet up on the mountain, on the banks of the Little Pigeon River.

We got to our spot and standing there holding hands with my husband, and looking into his eyes made me realize that through everything we still have each other. The whole world could just stop and we would have each other. We drove down off the mountain and proceeded to walk around holding hands for the rest of the day, wherever we went. It felt good to be assured that in the chaos of our lives, the love that we share has not faded nor been pushed aside to deal with everything else.

This past week I fell in love with my husband all over again, not that I ever stopped. I am a lucky woman and sometimes it doesn’t hurt to remind someone that they are everything to you, in spite of everything else. Take the time today to tell someone “I love you” in the way that is special to you. Life is entirely too short to take someone for granted.

thegeekwife

 

Difficult Christmas

by // // No Comments

One year ago today I wrote a post about Christmas without my mom, this is the second year without my mom, and the first year without my son and my grandchild. For those of you new to my blog, my mother died on April 11, 2010. I miss her terribly and things have been so different since she has been gone. This year will be a difficult Christmas for me, not that last year wasn’t. I have felt her absence a great deal this year especially since I am not on speaking terms with my oldest son. She would have not only given me words of wisdom, but she would have talked some sense into my son and I would have gotten to know my first grandchild. He will be a year old on December 26th and I have never seen him.

My mom kind of held our family together in recent years and the family Christmas party was held at her house. I inquired today about whether we were actually going to have a family Christmas party this year since I had not heard anything. My mom usually handled the details of letting everyone know the when, where and how of it all. Christmas just isn’t the same without the gathering at mom’s. I miss her.

My mother was always in the kitchen. Whenever you came into her house she was usually in the kitchen with her little television on the Food Channel, the Food Network or something of that nature. I remember going to her house after leaving the cemetery and walking into the kitchen expecting to see my mom, and she wasn’t there. It was so weird. Rest in peace mom, I love you.

If you have lost someone close to you at Christmas time, my heart goes out to you, this is a difficult time of year for missing family who is no longer with us. We try to focus on the good times and smile, but our hearts still long for the presence of the ones no longer here. I wish you all Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. May God Bless you all.

thegeekwife

 

Directing Focus

by // // No Comments

During the last two years this blog has had a mixed focus of family stuff and my domestic violence work. With the new year rapidly approaching I wanted to narrow the focus of this blog to more daily ramblings and family happenings. The subject of domestic violence  is such an important subject that I felt like it was getting lost in all of the other activity and not getting the focus here that it needed. My domestic violence work needed a new focus in the direction of where I wanted to go with that blog. So I created a new blog meant specifically for that information. The new blog will offer the same type of information and more resources for victims of domestic violence.

It will also be a place that women can find information on shelters and other resources available to them. I am happy to announce the new blog is called Hushed Voices, Secrets Untold. I am thrilled to be able to bring this new blog to you! Feel free to subscribe to both blogs if you like. The new blog will focus on the stigma that still surrounds domestic violence, and giving victims of domestic violence a voice, one woman and child at a time.

If you are interested in joining me on this venture please let me know. Domestic violence is an epidemic that has to be stopped. I hope you will continue to read and enjoy both blogs and I will continue to appreciate and respond to any comments, they are always welcome.

thegeekwife

Hiding

by // // No Comments

I had an appointment with my therapist this week and we were talking about all the things I have been through in the last year, some good some bad. Things such as getting laid off after 10 years at my job, the death of my mom, getting married, the birth of my grandson, my husband changing jobs, the death of my ex-BIL, the list goes on. She mentioned that those were a lot of life changes in a year of someone’s life. As we were talking about the feelings I was having about all of it, I kept mentioning how busy I was with school, my new marriage, etc… and she said something profound. She said. “I wonder if you are hiding behind of that busyness and not really dealing with your feelings.”

This statement really bothered me because as I learned in therapy years ago after domestic violence you cannot hide. Dealing with the feelings, the anger, the rage, the sadness, the humiliation, all of it has to be dealt with. I had to ask myself was I taking a step backwards. I told my therapist that every domestic violence victim is always on the road to recovery. We are always working on self-motivation, self-preservation, self-discovery, self-esteem and all those things that lead us to a better place. It takes work everyday. I began to wonder had I gotten so busy with my life had I quit working on all the things that got me here in the first place? The answer was YES.

That was an awful discovery.

It is like starting over for an alcoholic that has dropped off the wagon. Staying on the road to recovery after domestic violence, as I mentioned before, takes work every day. I have fallen off that wagon per se. I have gotten so busy with my life that I have forgotten to keep working on my recovery that now I am hiding again, not dealing with feelings, holding stuff in and finding excuses not to deal with stuff.

You may say to yourself, well it’s not like you are drinking or doing drugs. What you don’t understand is that domestic violence completely destroys a human being. It breaks them down, they have no self-esteem, no idea of who they are, they have no identity, no sense of self, no idea of what or who they should be, they have been told for who knows how long they are worthless, and good for nothing. They have been manipulated, followed, told how to eat, dress and live. They have been beaten and abused, time after time and most times, worse.

thegeekwife

My Wedding Day 7/17/2010

by // // 2 Comments

Since this past week was my six month wedding anniversary I thought I would write a post about our wedding day. As mentioned before @inthemiddle and I married on July 17, 2010 at Grace Christian Church. The day was perfect, the sun was shining and the birds were singing. I went to have my hair done, in Hueytown and then I headed to Vestavia to have my makeup done my Merle Norman. Ross and I had not seen each other since the previous day and we had made a promise not to talk to each other until we were saying our vows. That way they were super special. We also were not going to see each other until the ceremony, in keeping with tradition, so he had no idea what my dress looked like either.

I had been working on a wedding day surprise for my groom for two years and on my wedding day the only thing I was worried about was him finding out before it was time.

The secret came during the ceremony, when it was time for me to walk down the aisle. My husband had done all of the music for the wedding and he knew what songs were to be played when. I was supposed to walk to Pachbel’s Canon in D. As I stepped up to go down the aisle, bagpipes began to play behind me. My husband’s expression was one of confusion. All of a sudden the bagpipe player steps in front of me and starts down the aisle. My husband’s expression of shock and surprise was PRICELESS! He is still talking about it to this day. He had no idea and was amazed that I could keep a secret from him for so long.

I have to say a huge Thank You to my wedding planner/coordinators at Southern Events and Rentals in Helena. These two ladies were amazing and made my day perfect in every way. The reception was more beautiful than I ever thought it could be, and they even managed to keep my surprise a secret.

The only thing I would have changed is as we were leaving for the ceremony, a huge thunderstorm came and it rained tremendously and y gown got wet, you should have seen me trying to gather up all of my gown and hold an umbrella at the same time, yeah it was hilarious! But they say it is good luck if it rains on your wedding day so I guess we are blessed.

I have to say an amazing Thank You to the manager, wait staff and live musician at Pablo’s Mexican Restaurante and Cantina in Birmingham. They made my reception an amazing success. The decorations were gorgeous and the wait staff made sure my guests did not want for a thing. The day was a huge success and I am now, and forevermore Mrs. @inthemiddle.

thegeekwife

My  ring bearer and flower girl. Aren’t they cute??


My matron of honor and me.


Me being contemplative during the ceremony.


Our rings before being given to the ring bearer.


Beautiful picture of our gorgeous cakes!!


Our table settings complete with candles & menus.


Us at the reception before leaving for the hotel.


Our beatiful bed at the Tutwiler Hotel.

A Mother Missed

by // // No Comments

A couple of weeks ago my aunt called and invited me to our annual family Christmas party at her house. You see, over the last several years, my mom had hosted the annual family Christmas party at her house, until this year, she died April 11, 2010. I was excited about going to the party until yesterday. As yesterday went on I became more and more withdrawn and sad. I finally began to cry and realized why. I was not ready to face my first Christmas without her, or our first family Christmas party without her.

My mom would always work hard to make sure everything was perfect for the party. The tree and the food had to be just so. She was always in the kitchen when everyone would get there with some kind of food show or food network blaring in the background and the fire would be going, even when it was warm. Mom said it made it feel “christmasy”. We would then eat and share what we had been up to the last year and catch everyone up on the last year’s happenings. When you have an extended family like mine it takes a while.

I felt I was not ready to face my family en mass and have them talking about her not being here, being at a family Christmas party not at her house, and I wasn’t ready to expose my still raw feelings about losing my mother. I have worked hard over the last few months to make sense of our relationship and the fact that she knew she was dying and decided not to tell anyone. I was very angry that she did not tell me, I would have done so many things differently, but she did not give me that chance.

My mom and I had a difficult relationship, as you have read in previous posts, but she was still my mom. It is Christmas time and I miss her. I feel guilty for not attending the party but I just wasn’t ready. I hope my family will understand one day, but it was just too soon.

If you are celebrating Christmas without someone you love this year my heart goes out to you. Merry Christmas to all of you. Merry Christmas mom, I love you.

thegeekwife                

« Older posts
Newer posts »